July 29, 2009

And here we are...

The heat has pulled me from my slumber. Hardly sweet... my heels have been sticking to the pavement as I move from one air conditioned bliss to another.

I am tempted my my neighbour's pool. They even have the honeysuckle that goes with it.

Sitting here, in the mid dark while sipping a glass that is mostly ice, I am reminded of how dreams cannot be merely pushed away as a used toy. How pervasive they are, whispering to us constantly their lover's lament of being forgotten.

I have such a dream.

The universe sends us signs, a good friend told me. There are guides along the way. If we turn our eyes from them, they too will eventually fade into the background. We see the signs, the path is well lit for us and yet we would rather choose the darkest corridors. The harder path. The one that contravenes our souls song.

It is so easy to muffle that sound. To turn away, resisting the climb.

Life is beautiful. Distracting. These last few weeks have been about the sensation and less about the mechanics of paying attention to the reality. This heat, the gentle desire of my mind, fingers, mouth and teeth. These desires haunt me. Now, is the loudest voice. The greatest music. The dream is lost in the heat of a summer night. (Notice how it sinks into your skin? Can you feel that pressure to lay down and just ... give in?)

But fall will come. She will come and shake the flowers from our hair. And then, and only then it seems... we will focus on the music of our soul.

First, we must dance with the seductress, desire. All 39 degrees of her.